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Mc Cormack attempted suicide twice in the wake of the arrest.

He felt guilty about how his family and friends had been dragged into the mess.

'He ruminated quite a lot, putting himself back in his adolescence'.

Hours after the call, the lawyer and a bailed Mc Cormack were walking free from Redfern Police Station - and into a media squall.

'It's not your mess I've created, it's mine,' he wrote in a suicide note.

He was admitted to hospital and at one point even checked every hour.

'I'm 27, gay, single, love young bs (boys)', Reale said.

Raids would soon be carried out at his unit in Alexandria and at Nine's offices in Willoughby, sending shockwaves through the media.

Ironically, criminal lawyer Sam Macedone was on his way to shoot a quick grab for A Current Affair when he got the call from Mc Cormack.

'Sam, I've been arrested,' Mr Macedone recalled Mc Cormack saying. I found it a bit confronting.'I said, hang on, I'll be there straight away.'Mr Macedone found Mc Cormack at Redfern police station.

He learned the journalist had long been troubled by his thoughts about children and had been seeing psychiatrists for years.

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